Ezri Speaks

“I am a Play dough Pirate! ARRRR!”

Here are some other assorted conversations with Ezri.

Ezri (to me with a heavy sigh): ‘When you are cranky like this, I just don’t know what to do with you.”
Children are like verbal mirrors. This was after I raised my voice to get her to put on her underwear after using the potty – oh, the crankiness.

“Daddy is a good cook, he can cook at McDonald’s. Amanda, you can cook at a restaurant where only stuffed animals eat.”

Ezri speaks the truth about me when we are playing superheroes and she tells me,
“You are not a bad guy. You are Wonder Woman!”

“You expect NOTHING!”
I have a habit of saying, “You suspect nothing,” when I am sneaking up on someone to tickle them. Ezri pointing at me and saying, “You expect NOTHING!” before she planned to sneak up and tickle me was hilarious.

Ezri explained to me that a pirate has a dog named Scurvy. This because of hearing the phrase, “ARRRR! Ye scurvy dogs!” If we ever get a dog at my house, we may just name him Scurvy.

She has decided it is the most funny joke ever to say, “Yo ho ho and a bottle of PEE,” in her pirate voice. This because a friend took the liquor out of the phrase by saying, “Yo ho ho and a bottle of pop.” And because nothing is funny like urine to a three-year-old. Okay, it’s possible that poops and farts are even funnier.